After 6 months, Hector is alive and well!

My darling Sunday,

My apologies for taking so long to respond since i saw you in May on that beautiful island you were filming `next top model`. I had an amazing time. The cast and crew made me feel so welcome and Maureen was an absolute delight. I found her personality electrifying, which may be just her or remainder of the electricity that still flows through her from the vibrator incident. I hope she liked me...i know she was quite upset when i accidently stepped on her, thinking it was chewing gum, then proceeding to try and scrape it off by scraping my shoe on the edge of a step..I`m sorry but people that small, should really understand that these sort of things are going to happen. She didnt seem to mind when that little girl at Toys r us thought she was a `bride of chucky` doll and insisted that the checkout chick do a price check on her, before Maureen karate chopped her in the knee cap. Oh well time heals all wounds, and its true, because 15 mins later i had forgotten all about it...I hope she can laugh about it now

Now, the reason for my lack of contact..after leaving you on the island, i left Thailand, i was excited to be offered a ride on a boat with some Butt Pirates..as you caan imagine this filled me with excitement, until later on i realised...they had actually said that they were Somalian, BUT they were pirates..you can see how i got confused. So i have spent the last 6 months, hijaking ships, stealing cargo, money etc..but as you can imagine, once you have stolen a ship trying to hide it can be quite difficult, so my idea of covering it with dry seaweed stuck together with leaves and snot so whilst at port in Bali meant we were found quite easlily. So i have been in Prison in Bali, awaiting trial to be released. I became friends with Schapelle Corby and we talked about our situations and how shouldnt blame it on the good times, and in her case, we should blame it on the boogie...i suppose considering i was in prison too because of my seaweed and snot fiasco, i too could blame it on the boogie. I became friends with the Bali 9, or as i called them the Brady Bunch plus 4 (i was never good at Maths) Schappelle and i would often joke around that, we should all go down the pub and have some shots...but considering half of them will be executed by gunfire...they failed to see the humour.

Anyway, anyway... i was finally released after i was able to bribe my way out, by telling them i had a facial booking i couldnt get out of..so stupidly they gave me the key and told me to leave it under the mat when i got back...haha suckers...I bought a surf board and hitched a ride with the latest Tsunami and am now relaxing in the sun and sand of New Zealand...i am dating this really cute sheep by the name of `Despina`..its funny the other day i was making love to her on the side of the road and a kiwi man stopped his car and said `OI you are meant to sheer them`...to which i said `no way, i am not sheering her with anyone`....you just have to know the language :)

So my darling Sunday, please let me know how top model went...there is a new Zealand version which Despina was short listed for but not as glam as yours. I hope Maureen is ok...and your love is as strong as ever....

I look forward to hearing you from you, and like a famous person once said....wherever in the world you are thats where you`ll be...

Miss you like the desert miss the rain...Hector