Hector loves that Sunday is in love...and he himself is off on anew adventure

My darling Sunday...

When i hadn't heard from you, knowing you were in the jungles, I must admit i really had thought you were eaten by wild amazonian Pigmy's, who would have ever thought you were actually now dating one (and probably getting eaten too...hehe) Sunday, that is wonderful news. You seem to write with a certain Je Nais sa Que (which is french for yoghurt...i think) and your words ring true of someone who is in love. I remember our chats as teenagers and how when you were horny you would say how much you would enjoy a little head, and who knew the gods would take you literally and give you just that. The gods move in mysterious ways (as does your new girlfriend i would imagine) I have the image of her hanging out your beach bag like a cute little beanie baby and the vision fills me with joy. Sunday, be wary though...Dwarf throwing is really huge at the moment and as i watched cable television through the shop window in the mall, i can see now that it has turned into quite a popular sport. 1 show i watched, i saw quite a few burly competitors with their dwarfs in bags similar to bowling bags where effectively they carry the dwarf on the side and the handles wrap around the middle (in hindsight it would actually make a really good accessory and Maureen might like the look of her body being wrapped in something made by Prada so you were able to go around with her in toe, and also have something to put your shopping in)....anyway, anyway, please done let her be exposed to this sport because basically what they do is spin the dwarf around many times, very similar to a dis-cuss and send it hurtling through the air until it lands and then its measured to see how far it goes. Very inhumane if not extremely funny.

Anyway Sunday, i have some exciting news, you know how for a very long time i thought i was 74, which was always odd as i could never figure out why you were 26 and we grew up together how on earth could i be like 50 years older than you. Well i found out that lady at the birth certificate office was what i politically correctly like to call a `nuff nuff` and she wrote my birth date with a pen that was gaffe taped to her mouth so as you can imagine the writing was ineligible so what looked like 1935 was actually 1983 a small but very vital error that has resulted in me thinking i am alot older than i really am. OK i know the fact my parents were also only 55 and 57 didn't work out either, but you know me Sunday, never really good at maths was i.


Well my travels have been wide and varied since i left the base of Mt Rushmore. As you were aware i chickened out and decided it was just too much effort. I also blame my age, see at that point i still thought i was 74 and didnt want to put myself at risk, and it wasnt until i was hitching a ride back with a van full of Nuns that i got the call to tell me about my age. Well thats my excuse and i`m sticking to it.

As i mentioned i had hitched a ride across state with a bunch of nuns who had opened a charity cheesecake business and they would travel around the US selling their cakes to raise money for the Pope to have a vasectomy reversal. The name painted on the side of the van was `what a friend we have in cheesecakes` which i thought was great way to get their message across whilst spreading their legs i mean message of hope to the hearts of Americans through the way that gets the message through immediatly `straight through the stomach` Anyway the nuns were dropping some of their cheesecakes off to a ship that in turn was going to delivery them to the starving priests of Thailand, so i thought `FUCK IT, i`m going to stowaway on the boat and come and see you` I am assuming you are still in the jungles there, so hopefully you will still be there and i will be able to see you and your new mini wheat of a girlfriend!!!

So keep your phone and pc on Sunday, as i am lying under this canvas on one of the lifeboats waiting for it to set sail....Soon oh soon my Sunday, i will be seeing you in person.

An engorged penis full of love, from me to you

Hector :)